Where it all began

December 3, 2012 a very dear friend took her life. I remember it like it was yesterday and her death had as profound an impact on me as her life did. I struggled, as many others did after her death, I struggled with how to handle my feelings. My husband watched me cry at the drop of a hat for months, I was pregnant with our second daughter and I think he was afraid. He looked at me one night and said, "Honey, you've got to talk to somebody."
I was mad, there was only one person I wanted to talk to, and she was gone. That's when "Letters to Eimajn" began. I created an email account and began writing emails to help myself through this time. Some names are changed for her family's privacy, but what you read from here on out will be the raw emails I've written since the night my husband and I spoke.
I share this in hopes that it will help someone. If one person reads this and decides not to commit suicide, or if I can support a suicide survivor, then sharing my personal story will be worth it. I welcome your comments, but ask for respect, everyone is entitled to their feelings.